Be A Bit More Elvis...
With the eventing season in full flow,I thought I'd share this little post I wrote with you all....bear with me on this one mmmmkay?
Last summer Me, Mr P and the Childerbeasts went to a wedding. It was a beautiful, unique wedding based around a relaxed, festival feel. In the afternoon there was an Elvis impersonator. Now this guy was a skinny fella, wearing the sort of Elvis suit from a fancy dress shop you did not want to have anywhere near any form of naked flame. He sang along to a pretty naff backing track. Yes, he sounded like Elvis but there were times he hit notes we all winced a little at......but you know what? He had everyone up and dancing, singing along, clapping, enjoying his performance. Why was that? Well to me it was fairly obvious...he was bloody loving what he was doing! He didn't care his backing track was naff or his Elvis suit a bit tight around his balls, he was up on that stage thrusting and jiggling like he was The King. His enthusiasm was utterly infectious and you couldn't help but get swept along with it. It was brilliant. Afterwards I had a chat with him and was one of many to congratulate him he said to me: 'I know I'm not the best, I'm not going to be signed up and flown out to Vegas, but I love every minute of it. Yes, I'm sure some people think 'look at that pillock' but they're not the ones up on a stage getting people dancing' I think us eventers should be more like this Elvis (I'm not suggesting we all start eating more cheeseburgers and growing sideburns BTW). It can be scary putting yourself up on that eventing stage, particularly in this day and age where every result is at people's finger tips. You might not be the best in the world but that shouldn't stop you from doing what you love. Yes, you might hit the odd bum note and have a dodgy result or 2 but if you can learn from it, improve and keep going, then what does that really matter? You may have your doubters, those who feel it's their right to be negative about you, but are they the ones out there giving it their all? I've realised that I've fully embraced my inner Elvis impersonator, I'm not afraid to 'whoop' with joy when I cross the finish line, I don't care if people think I'm a loon for constantly telling my horse he's amazing, I've even managed a cheeky wave to a fence judge or the commentators box. Hell, I've become quite famous locally for wearing one black sock and one white sock (I genuinely can't remember if it's the black or white which are the lucky ones so I'm taking no chances). I know I've got my doubters with their suspicious minds and I'm sure many think 'what a pillock!' Or more likely 'that talented horse is wasted with her' but I'm *finally* starting to realise that I no longer give a shite about them, I'm the one up on that stage giving it a little less conversation whilst they are watching. I'd like to think that others are enjoying my burning love for our brilliant sport, I've made some ace friends and supporters who are clapping and cheering me on. Even Mr P has noticed the change! So ladies and gentlemen next time you are out competing, or just riding, I ask you to make like the Elvis Impersonator, it doesn't matter if you rock up in a tatty trailer, that your saddle isn't a Devoucoux or that your horse is part bog pony, what matters is you give it your all and love every minute. Ahhhhhhhhthankyouverymuch. Mastering Horse Ownership... Me: I'm scaaaaaaared!!
Miiince: *rolls eyes* Oh for goodness sake mother, shut your eyes, hold on tight & leave me to it, I've got this!!
1. Pretend you have a horse by ringing a vet and farrier everyday, and emptying your bank account into an abyss
2. Pretend you are going eventing by getting up at 3am, giving a complete stranger £100, then buying a £20 photo of yourself pulling a funny face. 3. Replicate the *thrill* of eventing by throwing yourself down the stairs, then standing in a field in the rain burning £50 notes (courtesy of Kellie Fisher's boss) 4. Forget Easter Egg hunts: get yourself a horse and spend every weekend looking for the elusive 'missing shoe' 5. Pretend you don't own horses by screenshotting your online banking 30 seconds after you've been paid. Look at this picture instead of checking your bank account. 6. Practise for owning a horse by buying your cat the best bed, feed, collar, cat trainer and cat house you possibly can....yet continue to convince yourself constantly you are failing them, doing it all wrong, aren't as doing as well as all the other cat owners and have bought them all the wrong things. 7. Replicate the thrill of dressage by rolling in over priced diamanté, then running in circles for 5 minutes, whilst someone tells you how crap you are at running in circles. 8. Master the main skill of a Thoroughbred owner by looking at your horse's feet, counting to 3 then crying 9. Replicate the joy of owning horses in winter by wearing clothes borrowed from a tramp and getting someone to throw freezing cold mud at you at 5am every morning. 10. Pretend you have a horsebox by sitting nervously outside an MOT station and giving away your food shopping money. |
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